Walker Texas Ranger Chuck Norris Makes It Out To Support Mike Huckabee

A few weeks ago I did a really really mean post about Presidential hopeful Mike Huckabee and body fat distribution in general. I thought it was completely done in poor taste and decided to delete it, but I do want to revisit the Huckster.

This man scares me. From his total batshit crazy Faith-Based Constitution to his projected obsession with homosexuality, you would think many of these wacked out ideas of his would be plenty for half-thinking zombies to run for the hills and take his bizarrely life-like resemblance to Nixon off the goddamn TV and off the polls for good. But that would take a miracle free and publicly funded media to accomplish. So instead, I urge everyone, who seems so fixated on celebrity and Britney anyway, to maybe then make your decisions based on which "famous" person stands behind them during acceptance speeches.



Chuck Norris is the absolute worst artiste evah! I actually find a C-section not nearly as gut-wrenching and vomit inducing as watching Chuck Norris act. Just look at him. The TEETH! The botox! Jesus!

This is my call for everyone to denounce any candidate who uses such pitiful actORs as campaign tools (by 'tools' I mean that literally and figuratively). As though Chuck Norris has some sort of wherewith all for political discourse anyway. He can't even convince me he's a Texas Ranger, how am I going to be convinced Huckadip should be President? Chuck apparently has never taken a road trip in places like Bolivia where there is no such thing as tax collection, but he's sure passionate about his phallus...err I mean gun...heh heh, heh. I might think differently if it was De Niro or somebody cool like that. But crappy actors who have for years polluted the airwaves with horribly bad syndication and infomercials should be banned from showing their faces on TV ever again.

If Chuck Norris's face isn't enough for you to give the Huck a big Chuck in the ass, then you should be disenfranchised.

UPDATE:

Ric Flair has joined the ranks of douchedom. Whoo!